Tag Archives: Humor

Still Ticking

Carl walked into the office at Offgoods’ Trading Co. and seated himself uncomfortably in a throwback wooden armchair, clearing his throat to further announce his arrival. The company’s eponymous owner, William, scribbled diligently away at his desk, seemingly oblivious to … Continue reading

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On the Subject of Snails…

I had one Barbie in my lifetime. I found her in the back garden when I was about four, and although I wasn’t sure why she was so important, I was sure she was; important enough to keep secret. She … Continue reading

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Chicken Soup

I have on my desk at work a Chicken Soup for the Soul calendar. Me and a million other girls, right? What sets mine apart is it’s currently on August 21st. Of 2006. Yes, I know,  and that’s really nothing. … Continue reading

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Two for the Price of One

It all started with a cup of ants. That probably sounds like the beginning of another of my humor posts. I assure you it was no laughing matter to the poor lady who stormed in and slammed her coke* down … Continue reading

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Green Around the Edges

How could I ever forget that dreadful day? It was mid-summer of 1979. I had just started a new modeling job and I was driving home from my first photo shoot. Not many girls start modeling at thirty-nine; I know. … Continue reading

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Waterfall

There was a time (and it almost never really matters, when such things occur, what time that truly was) when the rains poured incessantly from the sky. They poured and they poured, and it seemed there would be no end. … Continue reading

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The Comedy in Tragedy

I used to dream of being an actress. By the time I got my first chance at nine, it was already secondary to my dream of being a writer, but it was a dream none the less. I think all … Continue reading

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Jesús of Nazareth

John the Baptist is just preparing to wade out into the water. A crowd of people have gathered on the bank, awaiting baptism by water. Jesús, who looks suspiciously like Cheech Marin in a robe,  pushes past the crowd, and … Continue reading

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Little Boxes III

“Afternoon, Ma’am, are you here to pick up a prescription?” “No, not a prescription. My friend said he called in an order for me.” “Sure, let me check that for you. And what name would that be under?” “Schilde. S-C-H-I-L-D-E…” … Continue reading

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Night of the Living Dead

October 31st, for most people, is a night of frightful festivities. Houses are decorated, Jack-o-lanterns are lit, costume parties are in full swing. Witches, bumble bees, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles roam the streets, pillaging doorstep after candlelit doorstep for … Continue reading

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